How to get structured?

I’m currently reading Atomic Habits by James Clear, and I really have to say – or rather, I really hope – that this book will be the game-changer I need to break free from my bad habits.

We all have them. Some people have more, some have fewer. Sadly, I belong to the first group. I have a lot of bad habits, starting with not being organized and structured. In my mind, I am. I can easily schedule all my appointments and never forget a task. But physically, I’m so chaotic that sometimes I get frustrated with myself. Not being able to find my keys when I have to leave the house is just one example of how disorganized I can be. But yes, I’m tired of cleaning up my things – and my kids‘ things – every evening. I don’t want to spend my free time, when the kids are asleep, cleaning the house only to see it as chaotic as always the next day.

As you may know, I’m a fan of minimalist living. I don’t need many physical objects to be happy, so our home isn’t cluttered with things we don’t really need. But back to the point: how can I specifically apply the ideas from James Clear’s book to my life? The most important conclusion he drew was not to focus on the goals I want to achieve, but instead on the systems. Otherwise, I’d just end up more frustrated in the long run.

In my situation, my goal isn’t to have a perfectly clean home all the time. It might sound strange at first because, yes, I do want that primarily, but I’m open to adapting his approach. As Clear says, the goals will come naturally once you’ve developed the best system for adopting good habits.

The next key point was that good habits are easier to form when you truly believe in them and when they become part of your identity. That means I should stop describing myself as a chaotic person. By doing this all the time, my mind will continue to believe it, and that belief becomes deeply ingrained. So now, I tell myself every day that I am just as organized physically as I am mentally. I am not chaotic, I am organized. I say this to myself, and by doing so, I am becoming someone who believes it, not just someone who wants to be that way.

Aside from these mental shifts, there’s one more aspect: finding the best system to help me be less chaotic.

1. First, every item in your home needs its own specific place. There should not be a single thing without a designated spot. This one I can easily confirm. In fact, every little thing already has its place. With the kids’ stuff, it’s a little more difficult. They have small treasures, tiny items that don’t belong to big sets or games. We have a box for them. To be honest, there are no rules or structures in this box, but it’s okay for me – and most importantly, for the kids – because it’s their treasure chest. So, the first part of my own system is done.
2. When you’re done using something, put it back in its specific place. This is the most important, and also the most difficult part for me to implement. But I’m going to give it a try. At first, it will be hard not to forget, but I hope that over time, putting things back will become an automatic habit. Because, as we’ve learned, I am a believer now, and my newly established identity is that of an organized person.

I haven’t finished the book yet, but I wanted to write down the ideas that popped into my mind while reading it. To sum up:

1. Start believing that you’re structured. You don’t want to be organized – you are organized. You feel better in a clean home, and you’re more creative in a structured environment. Don’t tell yourself what you want, tell yourself who you are!
2. Don’t tell yourself you just want a clean home. Tell yourself why you’ll have it: because you’re an organized person. And with being organized, good things will follow, like not wasting time searching for your keys.
3. To implement these two points, it’s mental work. And it’s hard work, so don’t underestimate it. The next point I consider as a side note, because when you truly believe you’re organized, you’ll adopt them automatically:
4. When you’re finished with an item, put it back in its designated spot.

As I said, I haven’t finished the book yet. So, I might eventually reject or revise my system in favor of better ideas. But for now, I’ll give it a try. I’ll let you know if it works for me or if I end up cursing it.

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